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    Keep Telling the Difficult Stories

    I had dinner with some friends about a week ago, and I retold (part of) a story that I’d been told of a painful in vitro experience that included the selective culling of some of the fertilized eggs. I hadn’t thought twice about it–if you go shopping for one kid and end up with four (!!) fertilized eggs and the doctor offers to cull the herd in a standard (albeit risky) procedure, there’s little issue with taking said option. My nurse friend didn’t say anything, but she got a look on her face. Oops? The word “abortion” never even crossed my mind as a label for that until I saw…

  • On Life and Love

    Task-tracking: paper vs. tech

    Somehow, I keep coming back to paper. I’ve had no fewer than eight iterations of various Palm and WinCE PDAs as well as my current iPhone. I’ve tried plenty of task tracking apps on those, on the desktop, and on the web, and I always come back to paper. The main issue for me tends to be data entry. Quick notes, a quick sketch, a doodle–the iPhone (a slow 3G, no less) is way too slow. By the time I swipe, put in my password, and bring up the relevant application, it’s been 15 seconds and I might as well take the time to properly “file” the thought or task…

  • On Life and Love

    The spook who counted her money

    I finished The Spook Who Sat By the Door yesterday morning. Sam Greenlee has one hell of a knack for sharp writing, and regardless of my not being a proponent for militantism, the book struck a chord with me. Greenlee got at the heart of the loneliness of being black in a nation and profession that both expects you to act white “enough” (but only so much) and simultaneously disdains you for doing so (as you disdain yourself). It was and is a fine line to walk. There are going to be spoilers here, but nothing that actually ruins the novelty of the book, I hope.

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    When ignorance is allowed to win

    Or: When to Say No and Bow Out Ungracefully A couple of months ago, I stumbled across a local woman who was trying to get her non-profit of 3 years off the ground. She was looking for grant writers, web-ish folks, etc., and her cause was awesome. I was like, “Sweet! I’ll do a website, help with program organization, and either move on or keep helping if there’s room.”

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    One-on-one meetings

    I’m going to put on my team lead hat for a minute. Many moons ago, I stumbled across and read Johanna Rothman and Esther Derby’s excellent Behind Closed Doors. One of many great managerial practices and recommendations in the book is to do one-on-one meetings: a regular (weekly) meeting between a manager and each of her charges to discuss project statuses, job satisfaction, progress in and reevaluation of professional goals, etc. I’ve done and seen this done with two different mindsets, each with their own uses and problems.