• On Life and Love

    A Light at the End of the Tunnel

    Almost three weeks ago, I attended a beginner’s yoga class. I’d attended that one a couple times before, along with some more advanced classes. As always, I only did a few chatarangas and planks, backing off before shoulder pain set in. I took full wheel, which went smoothly (as usual). Later that evening, my shoulder was in agony. The agony persisted to the next day. And the next. For almost two weeks. The standard muscular soreness lasted a couple of days, as I’d expect. It was a workout for my shoulder, so I expected the tightness. But the rest was weird. My shoulder kept clicking and thunking in the socket,…

  • On Life and Love

    APW 2013: Intellectualism, Anarchy, Privilege and Power

    (This is the fifth in a way-too-long-running series on APW 2013.) I am not educated on anarchy or intentional communities. I consider this a lack in my education. (Seems like reddit may have a good starting place for me.) Dennis Fox is a psychologist from Boston who focuses on a few interesting topics: intentional communities and critical psychology. What is critical psychology, you ask? When speaking of truths, Fox said, “current psychology’s truth is in finding ways for unhappy people to adapt to the current world, rather than in changing the current world.” That really resonated with me. So many of the unhappinesses we struggle with derive from trying to…

  • On Life and Love

    APW 2013: Codependency and Identity

    (This is third in a series of posts about Atlanta Poly Weekend 2013.) I was utterly delighted at how many panels and discussions touched on questions of identity and codependence. I mean “identity” here as a self-discovery and self-listening process, rather than the external application of labels. I’m early yet in my own exploration of codependence and the unhealthy behaviors I’ve harbored for many years. One of the things I’m focusing on is (re)discovering my own life patterns and identity. It’s a large component in why I moved into my own apartment. When I saw a 5-7 adult family (with kids!) at APW, my first thought was, “Holy fuck, how…

  • On Life and Love

    Choosing the Unconventional Path

    Last year, Greg and I expanded the boundaries of our relationship pretty drastically. It went really badly, but has resulted in an immense amount of growth for me: I’ve never been so independent within this relationship, so free to say “no” and feel my feelings without justifying or suppressing them. And here you all probably thought I was kick-ass assertive 24/7.

  • On Life and Love

    Inherent Worth and Dignity

    I’ve been struggling for a while to quantify something I’m taking issue with lately, and I finally think I hit the nail on the head. Imagine, if you will, that you work with someone in a standard American corporate environment. Let’s call her Jane. (Jane’s a good, strong name. Speaks to her background.) Now, you totally get that Jane’s probably a good person outside your work environment (yeah, sure), but at work, she’s a total loser. Can’t do her job, whines all the time, and really just gets in the way of progress. You’re there to get a job done, and Jane’s clearly just killing time and collecting a paycheck.…