Pants?

No, shoes.

Completely by accident, I ran into WO and his family at the mall while shopping today. (Yes, I do shop, and that’s beside the point, damnit.)

Anyway, they were attempting to buy WO shoes, which is made difficult by the fact that poor guy has huge feet. Or, well, I thought that was the difficult part.

Turns out WO may very well be the most finicky shopper I’ve ever met. We went through the (admittedly slim) pickings at the local mall until WO’s father pulled us back into the first store we’d gone into that had the widest selection of men’s casual dress shoes.

Wait–“casual dress shoes”… It makes sense. Really.

WO didn’t want shoes that looked like boots. He didn’t want shoes that looked like bowling shoes (which I agree with, given the size the shoes would be bought in–you ever see a 13W bowling shoe?? Jebus.). All the stores had two styles of shoes… Guess what they were?

Finally, WO’s father said, “You can pick out a shoe, or you can pick the shoe I pick for you.” Wonderful! WO was like a little 12-year old, meekly picking a shoe while I giggled helplessly and tried not to get in the way.

WO picked out a shoe that his father said was too old, joking that he would be picked on for looking like someone from a retirement home. Then he picked out a pair of Dockers for WO that looked good, if one ignored the white socks and shorts WO was wearing.

The shoes were purchased while I continued to laugh at WO being completely and utterly pwned by shoe-shopping with his father. Clothes shopping would undoubtedly be a hell unlike any other, between his pickiness and my take-charge lack of patience… *shudder*